For those of you out there who do not understand what I mean by the title of the post, read it in Chinese. 嘴硬心软 At least, this is how I think it is being written. It means literally that the person is very harsh (hard) in the words that he use or his language (mouth) when in actual fact, he is feeling (heart) the exact opposite (soft). Haha. What a crap explanation right.
I have an elder sister. And honestly, she irritates the living hell out of me. In fact, it has actually gotten to the point where I actually asked my mother last night to speak to her. Actually, my exact words were "Ma, why don't you ask your eldest daughter exactly what does she contribute to this family other than being a major pain in the ass". Naturally, my mother's answer to me was "Aiyah, your sister has a lot on her mind mah.."
How many of you have been in such a situation where you really feel like you can no longer tolerate the the nonsense being strewn at you from people who you cannot stand. You tell yourself that's it! This is the last straw! The next time she approach me for help, she will know that I mean business, and she has made the biggest mistake in her life by making me her enemy. But the very next minute, when some one bad-mouths her, that person in question comes and speak to you, you will actually jump to her rescue, or resume the conversation with her. Ain't human ironic? I mean, you had just said out that whatever she choose to do with her life is none of your business, and that you do not wish to be associated with her any more. But the next minute, you are doing exactly what you vowed not to do. Including her in your life.
Is it that our human nature is such that we really cannot hold grudges against others? I know that is not the case. Cause there are so many broken relationships existing all over the world. So then is it just that our hearts and mind are created in such a way that we would be more susceptible to some people, and more harsh towards others? Or is it that in my case, the person I am biased against is my sister, who, is related to me DEFINITELY in terms of flesh-and-blood, and therefore, I do not fall into the category of people who can keep to their words of ignoring some one.
But then again, there have been some 'friends' who I can say, is in the same situation as my sister. Meaning, I vowed to cut them out of my life. But when they call me up, I seem to have forgotten about what they have done to me previously. If you are thinking 'short-term memory' in your mind, I can assure you that is not the case. I have a very good memory. Besides, if it's really a problem with my memory, then what of the people whom I have managed to successfully cut out from my life?!
Am I practising some sort of sub-conscious memory block whereby I only remember the good of some people, and the bad of others? Or is it that there might be genetically some problems with my brain? Damned. I sure as hell know that I have been pissed till the point of no return by my sister. She can effortlessly reduce me to tears, and still have the cheek to say that she did nothing. If some brain surgeon ogeniusus is reading this post. Please leave some comments as to whether I can do some brain-washing. Selected brain-washing I mean. In fact, it must be so selected that it only applies to memories of my sister. Damned, can't wait for the day when I can say "Crystal Tan? Who?!?!" Haha. But being the fickle person that I am, I bet I will end up chickening out, and saying neh.. I want my sister after all. See! I told you I was genetically abnormal!
Cheers!
